Tour Guide

Time travel is a risky proposition. Forget about stepping on a crucial ant or interfering with Granpa. No, I mean real trouble. You don’t speak the language. You visit New York and don’t know how natives jay-walk. You ask for directions to Times Square, and for the fun of it, some smart kid from the Heights sends you to Canarsie (hey, he looks a lot like me!). Worse, you sit down in the wrong part of Central Park and get clipped for your money; They beat the lovin’ stuffing out of you when they see that your wallet is full of funny plastic cards and funny money. It’s 1963, and having “mugging money” on you is a wise proposition.

But, Hey! you want ‘a see the sights? No problemo. If you got the DeLorean, I know a man who can get us the Flux Capacitor. I know all the good bars, dives in the East Village, and those strange shops near Times Square. Sure, that’s me, Carreras’ Guided Tours. Best deal outside of 1970 – but you don’t wanna go there; too rough.


The photo is of a Flux Capacitor. Mine is on back order these past several years, but as soon as its back in stock I am, like, sooo outa here. Admittedly they say it’s not for sale. At least to the general public. But I ordered mine as soon as the listing showed up. They’ve scribbled in that it’s non working for display only and that it runs on Plutonium. I’ve got my little Mr. Fusion and I don’t need no stinkin’ Plutonium.

Just a little retro fitting in the KIA and I’m gone. I’ve sorta thought of a tour service. Guided tours of the Village in the old days; that sorta thing. Reasonable prices, round trip or oneway. I’ll let you know when I open reservations. I’m outta here.

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