Know When To Hold ‘Em, Know When to…

Giving advice to a younger Lou could be an exercise in tact and patience. The words to that old song came to mind as I thought about this last night. You’ve got to “know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em, know when to walk away, and know when to run.” Offering advice can motivate a reaction to be receptive or dig in. Timing is often the key.

As a parent, I might have had the advice, but my wife frequently was the one who knew the timing. I learned to depend upon her for timing. Chose the wrong timing and all four kids could form a united front. Nothing would be achieved.

Also, choosing your locations was important. As a family, we hiked lots, and out on the trail could be a good location and time to provide a bit of counsel. Walking along a ridge in Baxter State Park and appreciating the skyline of mountains, valleys, woods, and lakes often seemed to frame a moment appropriate for some relevant advice.

Knowing that after a fight, tantrum, or similar event might or might not be the time was also important. Sometimes it was the moment when a message might get through, or it could just make the situation worse. I hate to be trite, but parenting isn’t about making the right choices one hundred percent of the time. We blow it sometimes. You need to know your child and act accordingly.

So yeah, You’ve got to “know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em, know when to walk away, and know when to run.”