Faces

I had a friend who, whenever something struck him as both profound and annoying, would tug on his sizeable red beard and state that, “I’ll have to cogitate my veritabilities.” So I’ve always interpreted the saying as needing to think about the truth of a situation. Why would you need to think about a situation’s truth? Maybe because much of what we see, especially in media, aims to spin things, veil actuality in mist, or make gripping what is mundane.
I’m not speaking full-on conspiracy theory hereā€”just spin. You know the meat and potatoes of advertising and publicity. In the past several years, it’s gone from being the domain of pros to something everyone practices on fakebook and other social media platforms. We call it curation. We curate our social media presentations as exhibits at an art gallery or museum rather than the cluttered, messy lives that we know we live.
Zoom has allowed us to conceal the dirty laundry, unwashed dishes, and bad taste in art by giving us virtual backgrounds. Our colleagues do not have to ogle the uncurated realities of our lives.

There is just one issue; our hands and faces. Studies vary, but it seems that we pluck boogers, rub rheumy eyes, probe ears or pluck errant food from our lips- lots. Some studies suggest that we do these activities from 15.7 to 23 times an hour. And I’ll lay you odds that the count goes up if you are agitated, angry, or frightened. Just think all those carefully posed selfies in scenic locations, all those Instagram shots, just wasted because you unconsciously did a gross-out on Zoom!

I have cogitated on the veritabilities of this intently.
I am pulling together a software team to develop a new video app. We’ll call it FaceOut. FaceOut will subtly edit all those embarrassing tiny hand movements to your nose, ear, and mouth. FaceOut will allow you to present a perfect Zoom presence without the annoying and truly gross distractions.
Operators are standing by. Invest in FaceOUt. FaceOut is fated to be one of the most impactful new products of 2022.
FaceOut!