The Director’s Chair

It was supposed to be a modern family remake of War and Peace. But with this crew, it will likely turn out as a middle school version of Waiting for Godot. It would be my master’s work as a director, my entree to Hollywood—instead, bitter ashes and a showing on local access television.
The dog, incapable of even barking his lines, my father – constantly ad-libbing – no, no, no, you idiot!
Perhaps I should have taken my mother’s idea of doing a Tik Tok cooking show.

No, No, you buffoon, it’s apricity, not apricot. Do you see what I have to deal with?