Fishy

My buddy from my Navy days was a petty officer named Mahan. Mahan’s wife, Stella, is the story’s focus- and I’d better let you know at the beginning that Stella is a mermaid – elegant tail and all.*

Neither family was thrilled with the match. The Mahans wished Walt had married an Irish Shidhe, one of the Irish Fae. Stella’s fishy relatives wondered why a denizen of the deep had not been good enough for Stella. But grandkids have a way of smoothing out these sorts of problems. You just remembered that Stella’s kids liked anchovies on their pizza; dream catchers over the crib were a no-no because the knotted string looked like nets, and trips to the dental hygienist were fraught with the difficulties of flossing those sharp little teeth. All in all, things went well.

But, there is always a but. The but for Mahan and Stella was Mahan’s sister, Eve. Eve’s favorite topic to talk about was food—preparing it, eating it, photographing it, reading about it, but mostly talking about it. For Stella and the brood, food was pretty much something you snatched on your way through the water. It was no big deal and not something you dwelled on. OK, a bit of salt water, but no elaborate preparation with spices or cooking. This left a big conversational hole in visits to Auntie Eve’s house. Eve would be eager to pull out the most recent Gourmet magazine, and Stella would try to hide her dislike for all that non-fresh dead stuff on plates.

This food issue became a big deal as Mahan and Stella’s tenth anniversary approached. Mahan’s ship was due in port in time for the anniversary, and Mahan’s family had been left in charge of the arrangements. Strangely, it was Eve who supplied the solution to the problem. One of her magazines devoted an entire issue to raw seafood, and not too far from the Boston Navy Yard was a famous seafood restaurant that featured a raw bar. Reservations were made.

On the anniversary night, the raw bar at the Union Oyster House looked like an elaborate costume party—the finny denizens of Stella’s clan mixing with the staid Mahans. Mermaids in elaborate and provacative costumes, Mermales carefully checking their tridents at the door, and Neptunas Rex himself present to congratulate his favorite niece. Trays of sushi, oysters, shrimp, and clams were on hand. For once, Stella and Eve could talk about cuisine on an equal footing or by finning.

As closing time approached, we all decided to sing the couple back to the harbor. The most appropriate song was “The Keeper of the Eddystone Light.” So a rather colorful lot paraded through Boston to the Navy Yard singing: 

My father was the keeper of the Eddystone Light;

He courted a mermaid one fine night

From this union there came three:

A porpoise and a porgy and the other was me

Yo-ho-ho! The wind blows free!

Oh, for a life on the rolling sea!

And so it went. Now this is no shit! I was there to see it, and all my shipmates will tell you it’s true. It’s not just some fishy sea story!

Learn more about Mahan and Stella in: “Mahan and the Mermaid” https://loucarrerascarver.com/2022/11/06/mahan-and-the-mermaid/