Many join political, religious, social, or other groups looking to be with like-minded people. I’m leery of close involvement with those types of organizations.
A few involvements in the ’60s made me suspicious of the emphasis placed on orthodoxy in close-knit groups. The leader has stated it is so. So be it. If you disagree, you are told to get in line. The worst ones are those that claim some austere degree of purity. Their shit doesn’t stink.
I was part of one of these groups for a month or so once and rapidly noticed that the leaders got away with doing stuff that we peons couldn’t. It all came to a head the day I wandered into the common area and found some clown playing with my guitar without my permission. I gently separated him from my guitar and then less gently read him the Riot Act. I was amused that evening when I was chastised for being too tied to my possessions. I replied that this didn’t hold for most of the group’s leadership. No one found it amusing. I left the group a day or so later.
Hypocrisy is common. We all engage in it at one time or another. The issue for me is how honest we are when we do, have, or engage in it and whether or not we take corrective steps. In other words, we are not perfect and can’t be ideal, but we can aim for honesty. Cult groups, whether political, religious, or social, are not. I prefer to clear out a wasp nest before getting involved with them. Orthodox behavior is required, and deviation from it is punished.
You should ask yourself how much you need to belong and what you will give up before joining.
Buyer’s regret is painful in politics, religion, or other things.
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I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member. – Groucho.
“Buyer’s regret is painful in politics, religion, or other things.” That is kind of profound. I think I could apply it to relationships.
My dad’s advice, “Follow the Monroe Doctrine, MAK. Make no entangling alliances.” He was right. But humans desire belonging. I’ve pretty much concluded that isn’t going to happen for me. I don’t belong, and I don’t want to belong. The tension is between true BE-ing and the compromise of BE-longing. No. Tried. Don’t have it in me.
I don’t mind belonging, but I hate enforced orthodoxy. I want freedom to think independently, and that conflicts with belonging too often.
Yep. I’m very careful about belonging.
I’ve never been big on groups. I did lots of business clubs but that’s about it.